last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
