i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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