and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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