Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
