How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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