remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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