I just made out with a guy for $7.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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