from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize