I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
