If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
You are a genius and a whore.
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