Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize