it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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