This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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