plz talk dirty to me
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
