quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
