guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
