dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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