She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
