I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
My dick has a subreddit
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize