PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.