i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Randomize
