the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
