just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
