Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
