No awkward lesbian experiences without me
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
