Your tits are I can't wait for
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
