that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
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