just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Who died my cat blue again?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
