Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
