Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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