Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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