put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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