Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
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she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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