But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
