Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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