So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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