NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Alive.
So much puke
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
