But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
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Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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