Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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