I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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