Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
