Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
