The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Randomize
