im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
sex in a hospital.. check
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
