Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize