He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
