i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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