just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
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