Your tits are I can't wait for
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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