I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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