Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize
