I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
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